There is no dignity in anger.
These are powerful words that might have saved me a lot of angst had I really absorbed this meaning earlier in life.
There is no dignity in anger. This thing called ‘anger’ that we all use, some more than others, harbors no redeeming qualities that can improve our lives. Then why let anger have its way with us?
What’s its purpose?
Does it help us blow off steam? Just the opposite.
Does it get our point across? Often it sideswipes or sabotages our message entirely.
The Good Side
While anger is almost always viewed as negative, there is a good and a necessary component to anger. Without anger, we can’t identify things that are harmful to us. Anger can be a response to atrocities or insults to our well being. But, like any and all anger, we need to be careful how we respond.
Anger looks different these days.
Do I get angry a lot less in my senior years than I did a few decades ago? I’m not sure. I get more irritated than angry. I’m stuck on the “I did my part. Why didn’t you do yours?” I recently tried to schedule an MRI at my local mega-HMO, and it took damn-near 12 days to set it up. Now, if a doctor told you to schedule a brain MRI, wouldn’t you want to get that on your calendar asap? I called the number given to me and, well, long story short, I got stone-walled and had to keep calling, calling, calling. I only got a solid response when I complained up the chain, and I made the effort not to let my words be riddled with anger.
Anger looks more unattractive on old people. Kids argue, sure. Young adults and couples argue, which is understandable to me. But old people raising their voices, speaking harshly to another? We know better. We know that anger only clouds any issue. Anger throws in another element of disdain and hurt. Lots of times anger and the words spoken in anger become the focal point of any issue.
Arguing does nothing to enrich your life, nor does anger attract others to you. If you let anger grab ahold, especially around others, people will be afraid they might be next to receive your wrath. Count to ten, take a couple deep breaths, walk away. Do whatever is needed to keep anger at bay.
Visualize ….
At this point in our seniordom we’re imbued with the patience of saints. We just know that everything will get straightened out. We have enough experience that reminds us to listen and get past the arguing as quickly as possible. We don’t want to waste another moment in something that isn’t good for our psyche OR our health.
P.S.
While this blog post sounds like it’s from me to you, honestly and more importantly, it’s from me to me. Also, the MRI, which I eventually got scheduled, turned out just fine.